Commuting fun on the B line

It seems like everyone is announcing that they're pregnant on Facebook so I think it's time I announce something as well. We're happy to announce that we're expecting an elliptical machine to join our family on Saturday. We're so excited to begin this (fitness) journey together.

The B line was a real treat this morning. One guy kept asking at every stop if we were at Downtown Crossing. We were nowhere near Downtown Crossing. Then there was goldfish brain and her boyfriend.

GFB: They were really freaked out.
BF: Why were they really freaked out?
GFB: I never said they were freaked out!
BF: Yes you did, you just said that.
GFB: No I didn't!
BF: Fine, maybe I could hear you because the train's loud.

I heard her, she said it.

Tonight I have a lady date with Lil Anne. Not sure what we'll be doing yet but she better bring me flowers.

I'm banning myself from political talk on Facebook

I'm on Facebook quite a bit. It's my natural reaction now when I'm bored to check Facebook and see what's going on. Lately though, Facebook is stressing me out. It's a non-stop barrage of politics and 2016 election talk. I've been commenting, sharing and liking and found myself just getting more agitated and anxious. I'm tired of seeing Donald Trumps face all over my news feed.

So I'm banning myself from commenting on political talk on Facebook for a while. It's going to be tough because I'm pretty opinionated but there's no need for this added stress. If you post a good cat video though, I will definitely comment on that. 

Glad I could be your elementary crush

Christmas is done. Faces were stuffed and drinks were drank. Derek and I had a nice hotel stay at the Omni Parker following Christmas. I'm just glad to be done trying to figure out what to buy everyone. Derek and I stay a night at the Omni Parker rather than exchange gifts. If we want or need something we just buy it for ourselves. I did get him a new winter hat but that's because he needed one when his other hat mysteriously disappeared. 

I wish Christmas was "magical" still. As a kid it was the most exciting time of the year. School vacation! Cookies! And of course PRESENTS. I despise Christmas music but I do appreciate a good Christmas tree and I'm not going to say no to Christmas ham and cookies. So I guess I'm not a total Grinch.

A funny thing happened on Christmas night. A guy I went to elementary school with facebook chatted me that I was his elementary school crush. I was home at this point, just relaxing on the couch and certainly not expecting anything like this. I had a good laugh about it. A) I had no idea and B) I was so awkward in elementary school. I mean does anyone think they're weren't awkward in sixth grade? I thanked him for letting me know. What else can I say really? He then told me he had been drinking.

I literally have never talked to this guy on Facebook despite being Facebook friends. I guess he got the old liquid courage.

Sorry my elementary school friend by I'm a taken woman.

Don't give me a pen when I've had a few drinks....

Here's why you should pray for me

Can we all just agree that today is rough unless you live in Arizona and don't have to deal with this daylight saving crap? Now can we all agree that my day is rougher because I can't have caffeine and I mean ever at all? This is not some lent thing and no I'm not Mormon. I can't have caffeine without feeling like my bladder is trying to burst out of my body like an Alien. I see people offering up prayers on facebook for dumb crap all the time.

My daughter has the sniffles everyone!

OMG I'm praying for you!

So I'd like all of you to pray for me and my caffeine free body. The baby with sniffles can wait since that baby doesn't have a job that they have to be awake for.

There's a new keyboard cop in town

Now hold it right there folks. There's a new keyboard cop in town.

I made the horrible mistake of getting into a "debate" on facebook. When will I learn? The answer is never. I just can't help myself. I nicely stated my opinion on a matter and someone was very unhappy with my opinion. I was labeled a "keyboard" cop and was told that I live in a cherry colored fantasy world. Sounds nice right? I waited for my blood to stop boiling (I'm a sensitive Sally) before I calmly responded. I then turned off notifications and didn't check for responses. See I have some self control. I probably should't have responded at all but I was very nice and civil about it because I'm a fucking lady.

So beware for I am patrolling the information superhighway with my cherry colored opinions. Respect my internet authoritah!

Facebook really tests my patience

I'm facebook friends with a childhood friend who really drives me insane sometimes. She recently found out she is pregnant with her third child. The father is a guy she had been dating for a very short amount of time and they are no longer together. She is on welfare and does not work and in my opinion should not be bringing another child into the picture.

Her facebook updates are non stop complaining about people being all in her business and yet she posts all of her business on facebook for people to comment on. In the past I've told her to be more private if she doesn't like what people comment or to de-friend them. She never does and the truth is it's because she likes the attention.

Lately I have been biting my tongue when I really want to let lose on her. I decided that it's not worth it because she will never learn and she is looking for a reaction. I've considered de-friending her but I'm facebook friends with everyone else in her family (I was very close with her two sisters growing up and as a result would often spend time with her as well) and part of me reads her status updates because of the drama in the comments. It's way better than any soap. I may just hide her status updates if I get too ragey.

My new facebook rule is to only comment on positive facebook updates. If you're complaining all the time about petty things I'm not going to comment. I'm trying to be more positive in my status updates as well. It can be too easy to fall into the facebook negativity trap.

Somehow this post turned into a partial review of a Lifetime movie and I'm sorry about that

So I downloaded the new i0s7 on my iphone because everyone was talking about it and said it was pretty and well I like pretty things and being able to talk about things that everyone else is talking about. "Oh man that new i0s7 took forever to download but it looks really cool!" I can't be left out of that stimulating conversation.

After two hours my iphone was ready to go. First it asks me to log into my icloud. I type in my password about 8 times and it's wrong every time. I know it's not wrong because I download music and apps all the time. I decide to just ignore it for now as I don't really use icloud.

Next up my phone asks me if I want to password protect my phone. I didn't have a password before but I recently watched this Lifetime movie called Social Nightmare where Daryl Hannah ruins her daughter's life by posting from her daughter's facebook and saying mean things like "ha ha I got into this school and you didn't you're a loser!" Whoa, way harsh Tai! Sorry I just spoiled the movie but you'll thank me because I just saved two hours of your life. So Lifetime has made me paranoid that someone is going to post mean things from my facebook and then I'm going to get kicked off the yearbook committee.

I should be all set to go with the new i0s7 except that my fingers do not seem to be compatible. With i0s7 you have to swipe up to close out of apps (which I do obsessively because I'm convinced I'm saving so much battery life), but I just keep swiping and swiping and nothing happens. My fingers are not working!

Other problems I'm having: when I try to scroll when I'm on the internet my iphone keeps thinking I'm trying to copy everything. I just want to scroll iphone, is that too much to ask?

There is one thing I like about the new i0s7 (besides the looking pretty bit) and that's the new call block feature! I can now block certain numbers from calling me! Now every time I get a political phone call I put that sucker on BLOCK.

Now if I could just figure out how to make my fingers and iphone compatible I'll be all set.

Facebook once again being unintentionally hilarious.

Your dear blogger is a bit of an idiot. Remember when I said that I lost all of my channels except for the Spanish and shopping channels? Turns out that they mysteriously moved. Why or how I don't know, but once I scanned past all the Spanish soaps I found all the channels I thought I lost. Thank God because I need to watch reruns of Seinfeld before I go to bed. And if you think I'm being sarcastic, I'm not.

I'm happy to be back in tv watching bliss.

I'm also in musical bliss. I went on a little downloading binge. A little White Stripes a little Dashboard, ONE Maroon 5 song. I know, the shame. If you've never sang a Dashboard Confessional song at the top of your lungs you are really missing out.

I'm going to continue with the randomness of this blog post.

You know what I find hilarious? The fact that someone was talking about Virginia the state and it tags me on facebook. I'm like why am I tagged in this status update about a missing girl in Virginia? Oh, I get it ha ha. I knew that baby wasn't found in me.

Happy Friday everyone. Let's eat some bagels and get a little crazy.