Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Living in the moment even when the moment isn't too pleasant

It was a bit of a rough long weekend for me. I was invited up to Maine but I just couldn't deal with holiday traffic and I wanted to visit my grandmother who's not doing too well at the moment.

Bosco decided he didn't want to pee in his litter box anymore. Yes, the floor looked like a good place for him. So I was freaking out. Usually when a cat pees outside the box they are sick. Not my cat though. I put down puppy pee pads and he was at least using those to pee on. I noticed that he was still acting like himself and not straining to pee with barely anything coming out so I started to wonder if maybe he wasn't sick. I decided to get small litter box at the super market and see what happened. He started using it the second I put litter in it. My cat is a special snowflake who has decided he no longer wants to use his regular litter box.

Maybe the sides are too high, or he doesn't like the cover or maybe he doesn't like the color? You never know with cats. I have a new box being delivered by Petco tomorrow that is the same model as his old one that I had before we moved. The things we do for our pets. I can see Derek rolling his eyes at me now.

So I was on pee patrol this weekend and I also visited my grandmother. She had a major stroke about four years ago and a couple of bad seizures since then but she's held on for four years. My aunt told me that she really hasn't been doing well lately and is getting quite weak. I knew I had to see her soon, I didn't want to put it off and regret it. She was very happy to see me but she is weaker than the last time I saw her. She really doesn't want to eat much and refused food when I was there. We're not going to force feed her. I did get to see some of her high school year book which was nice. I loved seeing her senior picture.

She just had this look when she looked at me like she knows she doesn't have much time and this could be the last time we see each other. I just want her to go peacefully and to not be suffering anymore.

Aging is scary to me. Not that I'm afraid of losing my looks but just losing your ability to take care of yourself and not being able to use your body like you once could. God that's terrifying. I hate being dependent on others. I try not to think about that too much and live in the moment even if the moment currently isn't too pleasant.


7 comments:

  1. I'm glad you were able to visit your grandmother! I try to see mine whenever I can!

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    1. Luckily she lives in driving distance and we have a lot of family around to help her.

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  2. Sorry about your grandma. I watched my mother go through a similar decline. The way she was at the end haunts me, and I totally understand your fears. I'm glad you went to see her. Her high school yearbook, how sweet.

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    1. I remember reading about your mother on your blog. That must have been so hard. It's really heartbreaking

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  3. Just like Abby I watched my Dad dying, and his end haunts me too. There is nothing good about getting old unless you are fortunate enough to be in good health. My mother-in-law is 80 and is amazing. Plays golf, goes to a zumba class each week, plays guitar in a band. Now if I'm like that at 80 I'd be happy!

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    1. It's really sad and scary. My grandmother was very active and independent before her stroke. I hate seeing her like this

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  4. Oh dear, I'm glad that you managed to solve the pee problem. Cats are so weird.

    Don't worry. By the time we're old and feeble there will be robot nannies available to take care of us. It will just be a matter of choosing between the iNanny or the PC version.

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